Thursday, November 04, 2010

Everyday life

Things I've had to scream at my kids lately:

DON'T PICK THE CHOCOLATE OFF THE BABY RUTH BARS AND LEAVE THE PEANUTS ALL OVER THE COUNTER.

DON'T PICK UP THE BATHTUB! (This, to Seamus, when I noticed out of the corner of my eye that the back legs of the tub were two inches off the floor. The thing must weigh 400 pounds. What was he thinking?)

YOU ARE GOING TO THE ACADEMY OF ST. MARTIN IN THE FIELDS CONCERT! (This, I wish my mother had been present to hear, since she was a big fan of the Academy of St. Martin in the Fields and now they are coming to Charlottesville and Grace thinks her Friday night is better spent at a football game. She can think again.)


Seamus, at least, won't be able to lift the bathtub for a while since he broke his arm. Which isn't all that remarkable, since what 11 year old boy doesn't climb trees? I was at the store and after falling out of a tree in Belmont Park, Seamus picked himself up and found Jon at a neighbor's house, only Jon's years of experience in emergency medicine have made it impossible to impress him with an injury. As far as Jon is concerned, if you are breathing, you're fine. Poor little Seamus took himself home alone, managed to open a bottle of Advil all by himself (there were pills spilled everywhere) splinted his arm against a pillow, and waited for someone to rescue him. It wasn't too long before I arrived and I could tell from the bloated look of his arm that it was broken. This was Halloween afternoon, but I figured we could get him into the ER and get his arm splinted and be out of there in time to go trick-or-treating, which is exactly what happened. Seamus broke his right radius and ulna and was more concerned about losing the ability to text than about how much it would hurt for the doctor to push the bones back into place, which did hurt a lot, but my boy is tough. It was actually a pretty good day for Seamus. The friend he'd been tree climbing with was a girl, and he'd been about to ask her out when he fell. After he got home from the hospital, he called her and asked her out and she said yes, because what girl can resist a boy in a cast? So he got a new girlfriend, tons of attention, he didn't miss the trick-or-treating--and some people gave him extra candy for his broken arm, and others gave him extra candy because they liked his Dwight Schrute costume. And he can still text! But he's excused from gym and doesn't have to write! Or practice his bass! And he gets to have many new shirts because we've had to cut his sleeves to fit his splint! It's like all the forces of good combined to push my kid out of that tree.

Freshly discharged, ready for trick-or-treating

Dwight K. Shrute

6 comments:

  1. I listen to a lot of classical music and was never sure there actually was an St. Martin-in-the-Fields. I also enjoy hearing the name Sir Neville Marriner...Such a terific classical music name.

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  2. Halloween memories to last a lifetime.

    Dwight Schrute? Now that's a cool kid.

    We've had our fair share of broken arms around here.

    How on earth did he lift that bathtub??

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  3. I'm pretty sure my girls would have been crying, wailing, moaning messes if they broke an arm.

    I love the idea of a Dwight Shrute costume.

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  4. See what all the childless people are missing out on?

    I laughed at the Baby Ruth situation.

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  5. Best. Last. Line. Ever.
    (Danielle, commenting anonymously, er...)

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  6. Baby Ruth remains! That sounds totally like my kids!
    Bummer about the arm. But the costume idea rocks.
    And I'll take your daughter's place. I love Neville Marriner and St. Martin in the Fields.

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